Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Emptying out the foot locker of my brain…

Clark Rockefeller-the guy looks like a sociopathic Danny Bonaduce. Oh wait, that’s what Danny Bonaduce looks like.

I love the Olympics…I could watch Synchronized Diving and Rhythmic Gymnastics all day…but what is up with the Mens’ Swimming Unitard??? They look like the women, except with more curves…

Chewing gum was invented in 1870 by Thomas Adams. How’d you like to be his tester? “Here, chew on this and let me know what you think?” How many times did someone have to chew some garbage before they hit a winner. It’s like the guy that tested Preparations A-G!

My Starbucks has reopened and proper balance has been restored to the coffee universe in Framingham. They made some nice improvements, and now that I’m back on the Starbucks bandwagon, I can tell you it’s not just about the feng shui of their stores, but the coffee is good!

What’s up with Olympic Beach Volleyball? This qualifies as an Olympic sport? Every March, thousands of people are playing this in Fort Lauderdale or Daytona. Does that mean they could qualify for the Olympics? At least their cheerleaders are likely have come over from a wet t-shirt contest…I think that’s what’s missing in Beijing.

If beach volleyball can qualify, I’d like to petition the USOC for “television watching” to become an Olympic sport. I can hear the announcer now: “Here comes Weinstein. He’s been working his wrist and flexing his fingers; they call him “The Intimidator”. Just look at the muscular hands. When asked how he trains, he said “Bela Karolyi trains me like those little girls. He says in order to be a champion, he must break me. He took away my Cheetos.” Here it is…He picks up the remote, and Oh My G-d he’s clinched it! He changed the channels without even looking at the remote. Weinstein is a man among boys here. No one had a chance! I don’t think we will ever see skills like this again.”

Actually I do love the Olympics, but only the amateur sports, and I miss Jim McKay, the voice of the Olympics. On this 36th (double-chai) anniversary of the Munich Massacre, let’s not forget those Israeli athletes that gave their lives in the name of their country and in the name of amateur sports.

Now, if we could only go back to the real tradition of playing all Olympic games in the nude.

1 comment:

ben said...

Regarding Starbucks and Clark Rockefeller, I've been watching that guy every day for a year in Starbucks by my house. Definitely not a case where anyone is saying, "I'm shocked. You never expected anything strange from that guy." Who wears Nantucket reds, boat shoes and a RL flag sweater in the winter along with a bad orange dye job.