No Deal!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Does anyone really watch "Deal or No Deal"??? I'm telling you, this is no "Press Your Luck" or "Sale of the Centruy." Unlike Peter Tomarkin, only Howie Mandel's career was dead until this show. Last night, we turned it on for a few minutes, only to see Marty Feldman's long-lost sister from "Marty's Trailer Park Shangri La" rolling the dice and using her skills to try to win a million dollars.

I think the casting directors for these shows, including American Idol, pick people we can hold up for scorn and ridicule--so I must oblige. This woman's eyes were like those from the beginning credits of "The Twilight Zone" and her rube persona and affection for NASCAR made me recall "Deliverance" or ...Britney Spears.

How does anyone watch this show (including me). These people are such freaks, and so unlikable. And don't forget GREEDY and STUPID!!!!! That's a cocktail for disaster. Last night was classic: The woman's got $100K showing on the board, along with $1000, $500, $400 and $50. After a series of bad plays early in the game, her offer from the "banker" (I'd like to know what he's doing in the dark up there, while staring at all those case-holding models...) is $25K. She's already turned down $77K, so we know she's greedy, but now the smell of stupidity is wafting through the studio. Howie entices her a little: You have a 25% chance of having $100K. No kidding jerkweed!!!! But she has a 75% chance of holding garbage!!!! Of course, she says "No Deal" with a flourish, and then proceeds to pick the $100,000 box! Ha!!! Collectively, all of us do the fist pump and say "Yes!!!" Serves her right--pigs get slaughtered. What a surprise that she went in the tank. With her mad skills, there was no way she could lose...She should have listened to her husband Gomer, instead of her father, Floyd the Barber. What a country!

Random thought for my night: Now that Rosie is calling out Oprah, who's next? The Pope?

Who made Rosie O'Donut the guardian of my morality? Who died and left her Queen? Did they get permission from Helen Mirren, because frankly, no one plays a stiff queen better. Helen was at her best in Caligula, by the way.

Why does Rosie need to open her mouth? So what if Trump wants to give Miss USA a second chance? Isn't that what Rosie's stint on The View is? If Trump dumped Miss USA, I am sure Rosie would be screaming about how cruel he is and how the poor girl is doing everything she can to pull her life back together. Hey, I don't like Oprah one bit, but if Oprah didn't interview the kidnapping victim first, Rosie would have been pounding the family's door down offerring him a car and tickets to her "family cruise." Rosie is nothing if not a hypocrite. Move on Rosie, have another donut, and answer the phone: it's you career calling, saying "you're killing me!!!"

Until next time America...